Opinion » Maxed Out

The answer man responds



"Dear Max:

I've just read the Pique cover to cover as usual..."

For which I thank you.

"We sure have a lot of 'Adult Services' competing for business in our little 'fun for the whole family' town. The Roxy's ad really stands out. The shot, from below, of a girl's crotch and butt looks fairly pornographic to me. But, that's just me. And where do we draw the line anyway?"

Thank you for pointing that out to me. The debate, not Roxy's ad. I was unaware it was going on and, having never passed up a good debate, I'm ready to give'er on this one. Which side would you like me to take, pro or con? Having been a lawyer, I can do either with no real conviction but lots of big words and no small amount of bombast.

As for having lots of "adult services" I guess that's understandable. For years now we've marched headlong towards rebranding ourselves as a Mountain Resort, not just a Ski Resort. As a Mountain Resort, we feel compelled to provide our four-season guests with the broadest possible range of fun-filled, adrenaline-fueled experiences. Hummers to Hookers, you might say, is practically our motto.

Thanks for pointing out Roxy's ad as well. I was only vaguely aware of it, not generally being one to troll the T&A section of the paper. You're right; it does stand out. I guess we should be grateful Roxy has enough class to dress that girl in a checked bikini bottom instead of going with the straight-up, split beave, BMFM shot. But then, it's still early in the new millennium. I wouldn't rule anything out just yet.

Fascinating, as well, is the range of adult services provided. Fantastic Felines? I had no idea anyone was providing animal therapy for visiting guests who, no doubt, are pining for the pussies they've left back home. I thought this was mostly just done in retirement villas where the residents are thrilled when the traveling menagerie visits with puppies and kittens. And in the give-'em-what-they-want department, I stand in solemn reverie of Adam & Eve. Who'da thunk we'd so obviously cater to the born-again fundamentalist crowd. Hallelujah, he has come. That oughtta warm the heart of the Southern Baptists when they arrive for the Olympics.

As for Roxy's ad looking pornographic to you, well, I'll demur to a far wiser jurist on this one. In 1964, U.S. Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart, in Jacobellis v. Ohio, famously said about pornography, "... it's hard to define, but I know it when I see it." As with art, I've always taken some comfort in his definition. If it's pornographic to you, it's pornographic to you. Far be it from me to get into whether it has redeeming social value or is simply prurient.