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Pique n' your interest

Time for flu shots



So I’m writing this Pique N Yer Interest with an aching left arm and a churning stomach. My head hurts, I feel weak and every so often a chill creeps over my body, making me shudder uncontrollably.

True enough, it’s early Wednesday morning at the Pique, which means it’s deadline day. It also means I worked late last night, ate McDonald’s on the way home, haven’t been to the gym for four days, and am generally stressed out about all the work I have to get done in the next 10 hours. In other words, it’s a typical Wednesday.

This column was actually supposed to be handed in for editing yesterday but I scrapped every idea I started – welcoming new employees, going to the pantomime, Christmas traditions – and now I’m even more behind in my work than usual. The result is that I’ve resorted to writing about... the flu shot.

It’s a timely piece, even though it hasn’t been handed in on time.

I got my flu shot yesterday, along with most of the other members of the Pique staff.

Apparently there’s no live virus in the flu shot so it will not cause influenza and so I really shouldn’t be experiencing any of the above symptoms.

The only side effect should be soreness at the injection site, which explains my aching left arm but does not account for the chills, weakness and queasy stomach. I feel terrible.

Could my mind be playing tricks with me? Would I be feeling this badly if someone came into the office and announced they were whisking me off to Hawaii for two weeks to learn how to surf? I can pretty much guarantee that I would be rushing home, throwing my clothes in my suitcase, preparing a celebratory margarita and sitting impatiently in the car with nary a thought to the impending illness.

Would I be feeling this badly if I suddenly had to do a story on zip trekking or bungee jumping? I can pretty much guarantee that I would be the first one volunteering for the job, putting my jacket, toque and gloves on and marching out the door, without a memory of my recent complaints.

They say it’s not the flu shot causing these symptoms and as terrible as I feel, I’m inclined to believe them. I think my mind is playing tricks.

So I decided to learn a little about the serum that was just injected into my arm yesterday. God forbid that I should actually research it before I bared my arm and put all my trust in the nurse.

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