Opinion » Maxed Out

Maxed Out

Government knows best



People, I just want to say, you know, can we all get along?

I mean, you've got the Harperites harping against Iggy Pop for torpedoing the nation's chances to serve a temporary term on the United Nations Security Council - an honour likely only one in 10 Canadians could even define - as though the man swung serious weight on the world stage. C'mon Conservatives; this guy doesn't even have that kind of clout in Canada.

And you've got every other political party in the country claiming the Conservatives are about as popular on the world stage as a raging case of diarrhea at a debutante ball, having lost the Security Council's bench-warmer position to Portugal, a country whose last great achievement involved increasing cork production and whose economy is swirling the bowl at such a dizzying rate the rest of the European Union is already signing it up for Greek lessons with Berlitz.

Of course, they save their most bile vitriol for Little Stevie Hapless. If only the doughboy hadn't opted for that photo op and a lifetime's supply of Timbits last year instead of being the keynote speaker at the UN General Assembly's Cures for Insomnia conference, Canada would've had the seat in the bag, so to speak. They also deride Stevie for the Conservatives' shameful foreign policy decisions to reduce aid to Africa and thumb their collective nose at any meaningful climate change strategy... without acknowledging the reality that without those, Canada would have no foreign policy at all.

Drawing on his vast experience in matters such as these, Stevie's spin machine has gone all hyperdrive into Sour Grapes mode - something he mastered as the kid who was never chosen for any team sport - claiming the UN is an insignificant, corrupt, Euro-centric, poopy-face organization no self-respecting leader of a minority government would ever want to have anything to do with. Conveniently, and true to form, all questions along the lines of, "Well, if it doesn't matter, why did you spend so much time, effort and ego on trying to get them to pick you? Oh, and by the way, have you been crying?" have been referred to Stockboy Day, whose tongue was surgically removed sometime in August.

I say, phooey. Sometimes you get the b'ar, sometimes the b'ar gets you. Whatever that means. Canada's got bigger problems than not getting chosen to be the Security Council's temporary boot-licker. Besides, we all know the real reason Canada wasn't chosen.

Unfortunately, when I tell you what the real reason is, it's going to sound somewhat biased since, in all honesty, it is the Conservatives' fault. But it doesn't reflect negatively on any of their achievements, there being none to reflect on. It isn't about their policies. It has more to do with a deeply-seated, unfair prejudice the rest of the world, and especially the EU countries, continue to blindly hold on to despite all evidence to the contrary.