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Maxed out

Sheepish Ontario voters have one final chance


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Which he did almost immediately, just before Little Pauly Martin called the current federal election.

Ontarians are so stupid – How stupid are Ontarians, Max? – they’ve forgotten that no less an august body than the very Supreme Court of Canada, in the case Everyone in Canada vs. the Scurrilous Brian Mulroney , opined that politicians can’t be held to the promises they make during political campaigns because even a cabbagehead knows they’re lying through their teeth.

But Ontarians – cabbageheads all – are so peeved at Dalton McGuinty they’re about to take their wrath out on the federal Liberals and hand the province’s federal ridings, and therefore the country, over to Stevie Hapless and the New Improved Conservatives. Or the Bloc; who knows what those nitwits will do.

Since 1988, when they pretty much split the province’s vote between the PCs and the Libs, Ontarians have voted like sheep. In 1993, the entire province baaaahed their way to the polls and handed all but one seat to the Liberals. In 1997, same result. In 2000, two more sheep strayed from the herd and all but three ridings went to the Liberals. I think the pattern is clear.

This is not to say the whiners of British Columbia are any less muttonheaded. While Ontarians were lined up behind Little Bo Chrétien, B.C. buds were wasting their votes on Reform… Alliance… whatever. And we won’t even begin to delve into B.C.’s colourful provincial politics.

But that’s not important. No one in their right mind would ever give B.C. enough votes to swing an election. That pride of place belongs to Ontario and all Ontarians should consider this fair warning. Do it one more time and the rest of the country will be voting you off the island.