The bottom line is that Ali Milner should probably have wreaked havoc upon her hotel room on Sunday night. She should have smashed the porcelain sink with her bare hands - hands that should have been soggy from wiping away all her tears.
See, Milner was booted off Cover Me Canada on Sunday night, after eight weeks. She'd made it to the top three and was the only one to do so without immunity.
She was so, so close to victory. She should be devastated.
But no. Not Ali. An optimist by nature, she was feeling both "awesome" and "incredible" on Monday morning when Pique called her up. Her level-headedness was both inspiring and infuriating. We want to see some holes on in the walls. We want drama .
Instead, Milner said: "It's all funny how life happens but it's all really good. I'm very positive."
After the news was handed down on Monday night, Milner said there were "a lot of hugs, a few tears" backstage. She then drank some wine - a pleasure she'd denied herself for the last eight weeks. She hadn't slept either, so she indulged in that as well and had just woken up when Pique called her. After the conversation, she was going to drink a cup of coffee (another pleasure she had been avoiding) and then she was going to explore Toronto.
"I feel incredible about the whole eight weeks. It's pretty crazy that I was on a television show at all and I got to be on it for so long," she says. "It's be a total blast and I met some amazing, amazing, amazing people and I'm stoked about everything."
Just to be sure she wasn't masking her emotions to save face, Pique called her mother, Jane Milner, to get the inside scoop. Jane said she hadn't talked to Ali much by that point, but did get a few minutes with her by phone shortly after the show on Sunday night and, she said, Ali was "stoked."
"Ali is coming out of this really a winner, in terms of how many people know about her, and her profile across the country now," Jane says. "Gosh, I mean to have eight weeks of live television performance, that's phenomenal!"
Okay, well now we know where Ali gets it.
But despite the excess layers of positivity, Ali says she's "a little choked" that they were handed the Barenaked Ladies' "One Week" during week eight. For those who didn't see it, Milner had one hell of a time handling the rapid-fire lyrical flow of the song.